I am sure many of you are tired of hearing about the following topic. I’m sorry. This is the last time I mention it. PROMISE! (believe that and you will believe anything!)
For those of you who aren't aware, I damaged the ligaments in my right ankle during a short slow run on Thursday which has kept me from resuming life as I know it ever since!
Initially, I had hoped that with a couple days rest I would be able to run the 10K race I had entered on Sunday; however I was just fooling myself! It was obvious this tweak in my ligaments had not untweaked and it wouldn't anytime soon without rest.
At the moment I am working on standing without having tears pouring down my face from the pain, then I will progress to walking and then hopefully get back to ... shhhhhh don’t mention the R word!
This weekend I experienced my first of any of these in my running career to date.
This morning I decided to have a look at the race results for the 10K Carlisle Resolution run I had entered. I wanted to see where abouts I would have been placed had I been able to run based on my normal running times (silly I know, cos does it really matter?). I went onto the website and looked at the fastest runner then scrolled down to the bottom to see how long it took the slowest runner and there it was staring back at me... it was like getting a slap in the face ... Lesley Wallace DNS. I am painfully aware I did not start but now the whole world knows too! Well the part of the world that cares to check the race results in Carlisle! I hadn't prepared myself for this at all ... I had hoped I would just disappear and no one would realise I wan't there! Wishful thinking!
I’m not sure which hurts the worse –my ankle or my ego! This was the first time I've ever had to miss a race due to injury, illness or something else out of my control. It's the first time I have ever missed a race full stop. I feel mad, disappointed and upset with myself.
Its hard working towards goals, and then to feel like you have taken a huge step backwards. There’s a whole lot of year left to race. I know I just need to be optimistic, patient and let myself heal so I can come back strong and race hard.My next booked race is in 3 weeks time - will that be another DNS?!
Yesterday I did manage to make it out the door (on my crutches) and made it down the street ... 0.26 miles, not quite a marathon but hey I'm getting there!!! My first walk!
So time off work ... no running ... now what?!
I have been reading the blog of a friend who was killed in a cycle accident last week and I came across this:
Over the last year and a half I've made great advances in my running and cycling and have put everything I've done up for everyone to see. Not every run or ride has been positive but I've commented when it has gone well and where I have felt it could have gone better. I have heard from several of you how inspiring I have been and I would like you to know that I receive a lot of inspiration from you as well and I'm sure that others, though they may not say it, receive a lot from us that post our workouts daily. I believe in leading by example and being humble about it. My 5k time may be better than yours right now but you continue to improve and soon you'll out do my times and make me feel slow. You'll look at my long rides and say "I remember when..." and I will love each and every time that happens. There are no boundaries to what we can achieve and the inspiration we unknowing give to others. Being proud of your achievements is wonderful but when they inspire others there is no better feeling!
... these words brought tears to my eyes.
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