Time to bounce back ...?

OK I woke up this morning and knew the time had come! It's time I hit the streets again and get back some running confidence!  I've been using every excuse in the book why I can't or shouldn't run but in reality I'm scared! What's the problem ...? Scared of failing (again), scared of feeling ill (again), scared something disastrous will happen, scared that I won't be able to run anymore, scared to admit that I'd lost all motivation to run!

Thursday it was the ironing that kept me from trying!
Yesterday it was the sun and my bike!

So here goes!  I've given myself a good talking too!  

I CAN run, I WILL run!

I have wallowed for long enough! I have cried, moped, vented, blogged about THAT diastrous run and now it's time to move on and bounce back, put it behind me and think about how far I have come since starting running 15 months ago! The experts say "find something positive that came out of it to help you get over it!". mmmmmmmmm tricky one!  I can't find any positive! I have analysed what happened that day, compared everything to previous runs and I'm still struggling to find a concrete reason why it happened and anything positive about it!

Maybe.... the positive could be

• noone I knew saw me walking home? 
• I made it home?
• I didn't actually die, I just felt like I was going to?

actually lets go for:

• I have learnt a valuable lesson!  NEVER run after eating a huge meal!

The experts also say  "Use disappointment to fuel your next success." 

How?

Well, I have decided... I am going to become process focused rather than outcome focused for my next few runs and try and have some fun.  I'm going to try and forget about times, speed and  distance, instead I will focus on the pleasure of running, the company I'm with and just enjoy the scenery and all!!  

I will keep in mind that running is part of a healthy lifestyle; it can make you feel stronger, happier and saner. (Is that possibile?!)

SO 2 days have passed and I've arranged to meet Vicky - my original running buddy who moved away, but is back for the weekend - and is willing to run with me at a gentle pace to get me going again (she says!).

So here goes - no getting out of it now!  Vicky is waiting!  I will let you know how I get on!

YIKES!